


sober words said aloud

by gigglesandfreckles



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Drunk Obi-Wan Kenobi, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Master & Padawan Relationship(s), Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Mess, Padawan Anakin Skywalker, and really needs to stay away from Dexster Punch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:54:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27665012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gigglesandfreckles/pseuds/gigglesandfreckles
Summary: Anakin's meeting with the Council is interrupted by his highly intoxicated–and wildly affectionate–Master.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 25
Kudos: 308





	sober words said aloud

**Author's Note:**

> Is there a world in which Obi-Wan Kenobi would accidentally get drunk on his way back from a mission? Probably not...but there is now :)
> 
> I just want these two stupid boys to be honest and love each other!!!!!!

“And where is Master Kenobi?”

“Oh,” Anakin swallowed, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his robes. “He’s uh, well he was feeling a bit tired after the trip back, so I told him to head to his quarters and that I could handle this.”

“And he...listened?”

 _Kriff_. Anakin forgot these people had known Obi-Wan longer than _he_ had. “Well, Masters, I’ve found that if you just ask him nicely, he handles direction well.” He offered a smile that he hoped looked more charming than it felt.

Mace’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Carry on, Skywalker.”.

“Right,” Anakin nodded, quickly. “So after we apprehended the–”

It didn’t matter how many droids or Sith the members of the Jedi Council had confronted and defeated–there wasn’t a single one of them who didn’t visibly _jump_ when the doors to the chambers slammed open as if someone had _kicked them in_.

“You started _without me?!_ ” an indignant voice cried out.

Anakin’s eyes clenched shut. If he didn’t turn around, he could pretend it wasn’t happening. Maybe he’d leave or maybe Anakin would wake up from this nightmare or–

“ _Hello,_ ” a voice slurred into Anakin’s ear as an arm wrapped around his shoulders. 

Anakin struggled to stay standing under the limp weight now pulling him toward the floor. “Hello, Master,” he managed through gritted teeth.

“Master Kenobi,” Yoda watched the strange encounter with curious eyes. “Happy to see you, we are.”

“Yes,” Mace said slowly. “Your padawan here was just beginning to debrief us on–”

“He put me in my _room!_ ” yelled Obi-Wan, a scowl across his face. 

“And _locked the door_ ,” muttered Anakin, wondering how his Master had even escaped. Then, in a louder voice, “I told you I could handle this, Master.” He offered a shaky smile to the rest of the room, trying to assure the Council that everything was _fine_. 

“ _I'_ _m_ the Master. _You’re_ the Padawan,” Obi-Wan huffed with a pout, looking more like a petulant toddler than sage Jedi Master.

“Are you all right, Obi-Wan?” Master Secura spoke up with a look of concern.

“ _No_ , I’m _not_ –”

“I _think_ you should go back to your quarters and lie down, Master,” Anakin butted in.

Obi-Wan lifted a hand and mimicked Anakin’s talking motions, making an exaggerated, sour face and occasionally sticking his tongue out as Anakin spoke. The younger Jedi’s mouth thinned to a straight line. “ _Obi-Wan_ ,” he hissed in warning.

“Skywalker,” said Mace, sounding impatient. “What is going on here?”

“Er, you’ll have to excuse us,” said Anakin with a nervous smile, already placing a hand at the small of his master’s back and guiding him toward the door. “Sorry to run out like this, Masters, but could we, er...reschedule? Obi-Wan’s a bit, uh–”

“ _Drunk!_ ” Obi-Wan cried in excitement. “I’m totally and completely _drunk!_ ”

“I was going to say _tired_ , Master,” Anakin bit off under his breath, trying and failing to maintain a smile toward the Council. 

No one spoke for a moment. Quick, furtive glances were exchanged between the councilors as they all no doubt considered what the _hell_ they were supposed to do or say with the admission of an intoxicated Obi-Wan Kenobi.

It was Yoda who finally spoke.

“Inebriated, you are?” he asked with an air of uncertainty Anakin had _never_ seen on Master Yoda.

“Completely,” replied Obi-Wan with a happy grin.

“We should really go,” Anakin swallowed, trying once again to lead them toward the door.

“But the _debriefing_ ,” Obi-Wan whined.

“Things with the Conglomerate _are_ moving rather quickly,” Master Fisto spoke up. “It would be beneficial to have the intelligence now versus later.”

Anakin wanted to argue with Kit. In fact, he wanted to do a lot more than that. Obi-Wan was _obviously_ not of a sound mind and Master Fisto wanted him to run a _debrief?_ Anakin felt his stomach clench with frustration as he fought the urge to tell off the councilor.

“Kit!” yelled Obi-Wan, beating Anakin to the punch. “Kit! _Kit!!!!_ ”

Kit blinked, his eyes frantically scrambling around the room. “Um, yes?”

“I’ve been meaning to ask you,” the drunk Jedi paused for a moment and scrunched his nose like he was trying to remember _what_ exactly he had been wanting to ask the Nautolan. “Why do you always _smile_ like that?”

“ _Why do I–_ ”

“Master!” Anakin found himself yelling, suddenly. “We need to _go_. _Now._ ”

“But I just got here and I’m trying to ask Kit an important question.”

Mace sat forward in his seat. “Skywalker, would you be so kind as to explain _how_ Master Kenobi got drunk on this mission?”

Anakin shifted uncomfortably. “Well, it wasn’t technically _on_ the mission.”

Mace only stared, waiting for an explanation.

The Padawan sighed. “We stopped at Dex’s on the way back to the temple. The meal was on Dex and we...weren’t informed the drinks were alcoholic.”

“Don’t you have to show some sort of identification?” Master Secura asked.

“Normally, yeah. But...this was at Dex’s.”

A few nods of understanding from around the circle confirmed what Anakin had always suspected–his master wasn’t the _only_ Jedi to fancy a late-night run into the civilian district for a burger.

“Reschedule this, we should,” Yoda spoke up. “Until more aware, Master Kenobi is.”

Obi-Wan scoffed at the smaller Jedi. “I’m _aware!_ ” he said. “Test me.”

No one said anything.

“Test me, _damn it!_ ” Obi-Wan demanded.

Anakin’s eyes widened and he placed a heavy hand on his master’s shoulder. He’d never quite seen the older Jedi _this_ intoxicated, but he’d seen him tipsy enough before to know how dangerous the territory Obi-Wan was headed toward was.

“My name is Obi-Wan Kenobi. I am 32 standard-years-old. Human. My mother’s name was–”

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin spoke quietly. “The Council doesn’t need your auto-biography. Let’s go back to our quarters and calm down.”

“Calm down,” Obi-Wan played with the words in his mouth. “Calm _down?! DO I NOT SEEM CALM, ANAKIN?!”_   
  
The Jedi in question flickered his gaze around the room and wondered what they expected him to do. He had been hoping to be put up for the Trials soon, but his inability to control his plastered master didn’t look _good_.

“He’s always like this,” Obi-Wan kindly informed the council, motioning toward Anakin as if he wasn’t there at all. “Arguing, bickering, doing whatever he can to get under my skin.”

Anakin opened his mouth to argue, but–

“Even when he was a boy, it was always _but Obi_ and _do I_ have _to study philosophy?_ ” His impression of Anakin was horrendous, but the room was too stunned still to speak. “Always so _contrary_.”

“Master, I think–”

“But here’s the real secret,” Obi-Wan smiled conspiratorially. “Are you all ready?”

When no one replied, his gaze darkened. “I _said...are you all ready?_ ”

A chorus of uncomfortable agreements echoed around the chamber. Anakin wanted to jump out the window.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and resumed his lazy grin. “He’s the perfect Padawan.” His smile grew. “Not because he’s _perfect_ , but because he _isn’t_.”

“Master,” Anakin repeated with a sigh. “You’re not making any sense. Let’s go back to our–”

“ _No_ ,” Obi-Wan barked. “Let me speak.”

Anakin threw his hands up in defeat, ready to hear whatever nonsense his Master wanted to spew. He fully expected this speech to set him back another few months for his Trials, but at this point–what did it matter? The Council had only ever given him the benefit of the doubt because of Obi-Wan and _now_ look at him.

“He is the most compassionate Jedi I know,” Obi-Wan started and Anakin’s eyebrows lifted. “He _always_ does whatever is necessary to help others and never complains about it.”

“Master–”

“Continue, he will,” Yoda interrupted, holding up a placating hand and gesturing toward Obi-Wan.

The Jedi Knight didn’t seemed to notice the interruption at all as he carried on happily. “He is fearless, approaching adversaries and challenging situations with bravery and determination. He _never_ backs down from hard work and is _always_ looking for ways to improve his skills and intellect.” He swayed a bit on his feet then, so Anakin caught his elbow to steady him. The motion seemed to pull Obi-Wan to consciousness and his gaze moved from the hand on his arm up to his Padawan’s face. His smile turned from distant and lazy to clear and warm. “He is kind and strong and I feel he has very little left to learn from me.”

Anakin couldn’t keep his mouth shut anymore, regardless of what Master Yoda had said. “Now, Master, that’s just not–”

“He’s become a wonderful friend.”

The words that Anakin had been prepared to say fell flat in comparison to that admission. Obi-Wan considered him a _friend?_ And not only that, but a... _wonderful friend?_

When had _that_ happened and why hadn’t _Anakin been informed?_

Suddenly, Anakin felt like a youngling again, ready to melt at every bone of affirmation Obi-Wan had thrown his way. Of course, that hadn’t truly ever changed–not really. But Anakin had gotten better at managing it. He’d gotten better at not being so obvious about how much he _craved_ it.

It was pride and he knew that. It wasn’t the Jedi way. 

Even so, he’d never been able to help himself from feeling that rush of affection and confidence when Obi-Wan had praised him. They were rare, those affirmations, but always bestowed when Anakin had needed them most. Every time he had felt unqualified to be a Jedi or struggled with a certain facet of routine life at the Temple or felt incompetent and stupid, there had been Obi-Wan.

Not always with the most straight-forward and conventional of encouragements, but _enough_. Enough to push Anakin on and fill him with warmth until the next moment he needed his Master to reassure him.

 _A wonderful friend_.

If they weren’t surrounded by the High Council, he’d probably see if Obi-Wan was drunk enough to let him get away with a _hug_.

“High praise, this is,” Yoda nodded. “Worthy of it, Padawan Skywalker is.”

Anakin felt both his chest swell and cheeks redden at the Grand Master’s words. “Th–thank you, Master Yoda.” He turned toward Obi-Wan, who still hung heavily from him. “And thank you, Master Obi-Wan. That was...that was generous of you to say.”

He wanted to say so much more, but he reminded himself of how many times he had already been brought before this very Council to discuss his consistent struggle with attachment. A simple sentence would have to do for now.

Obi-Wan tilted his head and blinked up at Anakin. “Padawan?” he asked, his gaze clouding over.

The younger Jedi frowned. “Yes?”

“Hello,” he chirped like he was seeing Anakin for the first time.

“No more Dexster Punch for you,” Anakin muttered with a low chuckle. He readjusted his grip to wrap under his Master’s arms. “You need to go to bed.”

“But it’s still _bright_ outside, Anakin,” said Obi-Wan affronted, pointing out the large windows. 

It was, in fact...pitch black. Only the late night Coruscanti traffic illuminated the skyways.

“Even so,” Anakin replied, choosing not to point this out. “You should rest.”

“Skywalker is right, Obi-Wan,” Mace contributed, his eyebrows furrowed together with obvious concern for the Jedi Knight’s current state.

“Continue tomorrow, we will,” Yoda confirmed.

“As you, er, _recover_ –” Mace cleared his throat and shifted in his seat. “Do you need anything?”

Obi-Wan looked around the room absentmindedly and landed his gaze back on his Padawan. His eyes softened and he patted the taller man’s cheek. “No. I have everything I need.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read, kudos, comment, or just click! I appreciate you!!!
> 
> come nerd out about sw with me on tumblr: giggles-and-freckles


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